preparing to take my leave...

girl:i think i'm gonna move.

boy:oh, i think that's good because that'll make you happy.

girl:maybe i don't want to move.

boy:i think you should because you'll be happy.

girl:maybe i will be happy.

boy:that would be good.

girl:maybe it would.

see what you should have gotten from that scene is that i'm the most indecisive person ever to open her mouth. even when everyone thinks something is good for me, i can't decide. all of our friends are saying, yeah, go move since your not happy in new orleans. i'm still sitting here dumbfounded by the concept of another decision. i swear these things take over my brain and squat there for a goodly while before i realize that maybe i should listen to these intelligent people who know me incredibly well and recognize that i haven't been happy in months.

ah, but what about boy? what about him, indeed. don't you worry. all will be mended in the future. boy and i have been together for so long that even when we part ... we'll still be together.

ironically, it's independance day. and i guess i'm just a small soul recognizing for the first time in a long time that i can go whereever i want to. i can be whatever i want to be. i'm never going to answer to anyone, and i'm not going to give in to convenience or struggle. it's not about america today, it's about me.

happy fourth of july, go blow some fingers off with lame-ass fireworks.