a moment of boy.
yesterday and the day before were filled to the brim, and the surface tension of tears was nearly unbearable. i couldn't think clearly or cry enough. i can't tell you the lefts and rights of heart, and i can't try to stand up today.
"i try not to wonder where you are."
i remembered a really funny time tonight.
i always made up little songs for mundane things around the apartment. if i was pouring cornflakes, i made up a song about how cornflakes were really good because they were crunchy and made of corn but don't let them sit in the milk for too long. if i was wearing my favorite underwear, i did the favorite underwear dance and sang the favorite underwear song. this was boy's favorite. i think they were his favorite underwear on me. so, i remembered that i sang these strange little tunes out of tune while talking to my ex-boyfriend and telling him about my christmas. i received two new pairs of jammie pants. suddenly, i heard boy laughing hysterically, and i was back in new orleans jumping around our room, singing ... jammie jammie jammie jammie jammie jammie PANTS! and on the PANTS ... i landed very loudly and scared our cats. then i somersaulted onto and then off of the bed with a sequence of loud thumps.
he just stared... and then he started his deep gut laugh again.
