put worth where it belongs.
most of us are just trying to enact that in the least painful way possible.
but you keep trying to prove it all wrong. lift yourself higher, the fall will be a brilliant display of acrobatic lack of intelligence.
don't give me that look, unless you mean it, because you can't take it back. i accept your "one true love" and raise you "love is bullshit." yes, go on, blink your princely lashes and laugh away my cynicism.
so the girl doesn't believe in love now because heartbreak is a mean old monster.
no.
i believe in love the same way i believe in any other maddening, distracting, weakening disease that tears away at your insides and leaves you alone to fend off a fever that never breaks while you're remembering when you were well.
and just like any contagious debilitating virus, i'll take every precaution not to let it take hold of my already feeble mind. i won't allow it to seductively ask me to give up anything to have a go at its own false freedom.
i'm not after love. give me hard nights with a bottle of wine and my few good friends. give me closeness. give me letters from people i haven't seen in years. i'll take it all, but i'm not after love.
i'll take geniuses, philosophers, rockstars, explorers, my buddha, my best friend, my lonely poet, and my memory of a trickster. because they offer more to me than the floundering cupid ever did, because falling in love is different than loving, because i know they'll last.
brush me off, it doesn't matter. i'll find myself laughing at you when you're gone. you're the worst kind of fool, believing in purpose but unable to pinpoint exactly how that drives you, wakes you up in the morning with a glorious tick tock resonating in your deaf little ear.
because we are not higher beings. we are not serving some ultimate purpose. we are only surviving.
